Friday, July 25, 2008

Love or not... 2007

Love or not....
Current mood: tired
Category: Romance and Relationships
So as with all of my other blogs, this topic was brought on by a conversation at work. I love making people actually think. The question at hand was/is what is the difference between loving somebody and being "in love" with somebody? The answer that I was given was that when you are in love with somebody it is an intimate and sexual feeling whereas loving somebody is just about caring for them, nuturing them, and not wanting to see anything bad happen to that person. Which means if this is true then my blog about Love is TRUE, a person CAN fully love more than one person.
I questioned this by asking, ok...so...if being in love is about the sexual intimacy does that mean that EVERYBODY that you have had sex with you were "in love" with? Which of course the answer was no, I think people are confusing being "in love" with somebody as romance or lust, sexually speaking.
I personally think that when somebody says 'I love him, but I am not "in love" with him." is a cop out because of the stipulation that society has placed upon us (as a whole). Polygamy is illegal in every state in the US because our laws are based upon fundamentalist Christian beliefs. Granted polygamy is speaking of marriage to more than one person, but this carries over to a committed relationship as well because of the way society is. If a person were to pronounce their love for two people they would be shamed and condemned by much of society. So, we have come up with a way around that by using the term "in love" as a way around people thinking that we actually love two people.
Love is love, no matter how you put it. Yes there are varying types of love, but it is still love. No two loves are the same, no matter how you look at it. One person does not EVER love a person the same as another. I love my children differently, I love Matt differently that I love my children, and I love him differently than I have ever loved another lover in my life and I am sure that if the time ever cam that I found somebody else I wouldn't love them the same as I love Matt. Love is a generalized word....and it is just that a word, the emotion and feeling that you put behind it is up to you. Everybody views love differently.
As for the sexual aspect of things, intercourse is typically seen as a way of strengthening a bond between the persons engaging in intercourse, but in reality it is just a way of sharing pleasure, just like if I were to share a piece of chocolate or cheesecake. Or to share in a pleasurable activity with one of my children. A person engages in a pleasurable activity because it feels good...and let's face it, in most instances intercourse feels good no matter if there is love involved or not.

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