Wednesday, April 23, 2008

My Resignation

I am hereby officially tendering my resignation as an adult. I have decided I would like to accept the responsibilities of an 8 year-old.

I want to go to McDonald's and think that it's a four star restaurant.

I want to sail sticks across a fresh mud puddle and make a sidewalk with rocks.

I want to think M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them.

I want to lie under a big oak tree and run a lemonade stand with my friends on a hot summer's day.

I want to return to a time when life was simple; When all you knew were colors, multiplication tables, and nursery rhymes, but that didn't bother you, because you didn't know what you didn't know and you didn't care.

All you knew was to be happy because you were blissfully unaware of all the things that should make you worried or upset.

I want to think the world is fair. That everyone is honest and good.

I want to believe that anything is possible. I want to be oblivious to the complexities of life and be overly excited by the little things again.

I want to live simple again. I don't want my day to consist of computer crashes, mountains of paperwork, depressing news, how to survive more days in the month than there is money in the bank, doctor bills, gossip, illness, and loss of loved ones.

I want to believe in the power of smiles, hugs, a kind word, truth, justice, peace, dreams, the imagination, mankind, and making angels in the snow.

So... here's my checkbook and my car-keys, my credit card bills and my 401K statements. I am officially resigning from adulthood.

And if you want to discuss this further, you'll have to catch me first, cause.......tag! You're it!

Friday, April 18, 2008

You're kidding, right? of you that actually know me, know that I am not too keen on the so called medical professionals. Well I took Britt to her doctor about a month or so ago because she had a little lump in her cheek area. Well while we were there he was extremely condescending. I know a lot of  it was because of how old I actually look...and because Britt is 14 years old. YES...I *was* a teenage mother, but I was a VERY good mother even at that age...and I am still a good mother now. But, anyway....we get there and he asked if I had realized that this lump had grown and  I told him that I wasn't really sure. And he point blank said, "and you ARE her mother, right?" WTF is that?!?! Yes I am her mother. We JUST had found this lump @ a week or so prior to the appointment and I don't make a habit of sticking my hands in my childrens' mouths all the time. But...anyway...ok he is an @ssh*le. So, he points out that she hasn't been in for a physical in a while and she is due for vaccinations. Ok, well I knew he was talking about the HPV vaccine which I have researched and opted out of. But, I ended up making the appointment anyway for a "check-up."


So, fast forward to today. I take Britt in for her check-up and she wasn't really happy with the idea of going in, but...whatever. I told her she wouldn't be getting any vaccines, he was just going to basically look her over because she needed a form filled out for the school anyway. So...the nurse weighs her (110lbs), measures her (59 7/8in...ALMOST 5ft), gets her BP (120/58), and then starts handing out forms about vaccines that she *should* be getting this visit. Chicken pox...(nope it's a useless vaccine, plus she has a 3 mo brother at her dad's house that could potentially get the CP), HPV (again, nope...this vaccine hasn't been studied enough for me to even remotely CONSIDER agreeing to this...I do my research) and Hepatitis A (oh shoot didn't research that one, but considering that the *risk* groups are homosexual men, IV drug users, and persons working with infected primates, I don't feel the need.) Anyway....he started lecturing me on the importance of childhood vaccines, and how with the HPV vaccine they really want to get it into girls between 11-14  years old because of the age that children are becoming sexually active. And then he asked if I knew the *risks* of not getting hem. Yes I do, thank you for making me aware. I have done my research. Then he said...well I just want  you to know that I feel very strongly about vaccines. I think that they are completely safe. And I wouldn't recommend something that I wouldn't give my own daughter. And I still calmly said...well thank you for that. But these vaccines haven't been out for very long and there really aren't any long term studies on them so we are still going to pass. He finally dropped it...sort of. he asks about her grades, about her period, about sex, drugs, and alcohol....asks her if she knows anybody in her grade that smokes cigarettes or does drugs or drinks. She said, I am sure there are but I don't really associate with them. Then he asked me if I had talked with her about these things. Yes I have, despite the fact that you think I am a HORRIBLE *teenage* mom....I have an AWESOME relationship with my children and we speak freely about nearly everything. (no I didn't say ALL of that.) So then he checks her over and tells me she looks great, extremely healthy EXCEPT for the fact that her weight has popped up a little. (Ummm ya dickface see those things on her chest...they are BREASTS....and see in the past year she has entered puberty and gotten some hips and @ss to go along with those I didn't say that either...I was TRYING to be nice.) Yes..I realize she has put on weight but she did grow 6 inches or so, and hit puberty. Well....she is a bit heavier than she is tall....(umm...ok?!?) Then he proceeds to tell her that she really needs to get more active, and she should be doing 1-2hrs of hard core, make you sweat, exercise daily so that she can get to a *healthy* weight. WTF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So basically he was telling her ya you are fat!


(Ok....1st off we have just gotten out of a NE winter....yes it probably isn't the BEST excuse but we aren't very active in the's hard to be motivated, but all spring/summer/fall long we are EXTREMELY active....swimming, hiking, biking, jumping on the trampoline, playing kickball, baseball, and just running around.) Britt started telling him now that the weather was getting better she is outside all the which point I was FUMING! WHY in the HELL am I letting my daughter VALIDATE her PERFECTLY NORMAL body with this @ss. So....we got up to leave. And I made the decision to find her a new doctor.


I cannot believe that this man is a pediatrician. I cannot believe that he is still practicing after giving this advice. I mean does THIS look *unhealthy* to you:


Brittany 1 month ago...




Hmm....perfectly normal to me it seems. But if this is the advice that doctor's are giving out, and add in the media's portrayal of a woman's body it's no freaking wonder that we have an extremely high number of young girls who have eating disorders. As we were leaving the office, Britt was commenting on how she is one of the smallest ones of her friends and she didn't *THINK* she was "fat". UGH UGH UGH!!! Nothing like creating a little insecurity in a young girl who had amazing confidence!! WTG F*CKING @sshole!!!!


I did speak to her about it....and she is ok, she knows he is a complete idiot and we will be finding a new doc ASAP! So...hopefully we have avoided any horrific issues in the future.


Ah.... I feel better...thanks! lol

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

The Universe hates me right now!

I don't recall doing anything horrible. We have been making a conscious effort to 'Go Green' here in our house so that we can Save The Planet. I was green and crunchy before this but we are doing everything in our power to reduce and reuse the waste that we are putting back into the Earth. So I am not sure exactly what I have done to have such horrible Karma coming my way this week. But I do.

Yesterday, I woke up and went to turn on my PC as I do every morning and NOTHING! No power at all. Hmm. So I went on my laptop to try some troubleshooting tips only to find out that my motherboard was bad. UGH UGH UGH! Thankfully I had my laptop as backup, though I really don't like being on it. Well, after coming to grips with the fact that I had just lost ALL of my music and photos, I was ok with it. I had that computer for @ 7yrs lasted a good while for the  usage that it had been through. Most of my photos were backed up to an online storage site and I can order CDs through there. (And I have learned my lesson. I will be backing up at least my photos on a monthly basis.)

The day went pretty well after I sulked for a bit about my PC. The weather was amazing, despite the fact that it was damp. We ended up letting the kids ride their bikes around the neighborhood for about an hour, and Gypsy and I walked/jogged. During our ride/walk we ran into Matt's brother, who repairs PCs, and he said he had a tower with a good motherboard and he could transfer all my components and have my desktop up and running within a few hours. All for only $30. SWEET! So...we took the tower back over to him, and he said he would have it done for me by this morning.

So...this morning I woke feeling refreshed after our great evening (oh how I love warmer evenings.) We went to the ATM to get the money out for my PC repair, only to find a negative balance. WTF?!?! So...I come home and check my account only to find that my car insurance doubled charged us. UGH! This is the 3rd time they have done this in the past few years, I am thinking it might be time for a change. So, I checked with the bank and then called my ins. company to let them know about it. Well I faxed over all I needed to, and they called me back to say I am not sure we can refund this. WHAT?!?! Well it is still a pending transaction and until it actually posts to my account they won't fix it. The amount is the EXACT same amount as my ins payment that came out YESTERDAY! ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?! Anyway...I transferred money from our savings account to cover the bank error but this is still frustrating. Universe, I am begging for forgiveness. I am trying to be a better person inside and out, I promise to do good for the planet and the people who inhabit this planet. PLEASE allow my week to get better. I am not asking for a great week, just your average run of the mill week. Thank you!