It really is a shame because my children are missing out as well. But I have to get over this. My children ARE better off without her in their lives. There will never be a broken promise, they will never have to see her battered and bruised because she insists on allowing a man to beat her, they will never have to hug her and wonder what the stench is coming off of her. They will never have to hear her tell them 'I have given you everything....oh right except love' (and yes she did once tell me that)
I will no longer allow her any control of my life. I will not invite her to another function, however I will behave if I do see her at a family function. I will continue to be the adult, I have always been when it comes to her. But, I have come to realize that I am better off without her as are my children.